EIGHT LEGGED FREAKSWarner Bros. Pictures
2002
PG-13

“Get back you eight legged freaks!”

In a small, dying Arizona town, a bunch of different spiders from a collection grow to ludicrous sizes due to toxic waste, and immediately start to sample the local cuisine (i.e.- humans). Wackiness…and David Arquette…ensue…

Let there be no mistake: Eight Legged Freaks is a tongue-in-cheek homage to the gigantic bug movies of the 1950s. No more, no less. And it doesn’t pretend to be anything other than that. Like Gremlins and Tremors (but with less scares) before, Eight Legged Freaks has ridiculously large CGI spiders running amuck (Amuck! Amuck! Amuck!), a motley crew of wacky townsfolk (including Doug E. Doug as a radio announcer who gives a freaking hilarious anal probe monologue), some cool Spiders Vs. Humans (and at one point, a cat) action sequences (check out that scene with the kids on the motor bikes), all with winks to the sub genre it’s emulating. I found myself enjoying this…and apparently I was the only one, as I saw people get up and leave the theater during the film. These were probably the same people who don’t get Monty Python, so it’s not really a reflection on the flick…

I do admit, though, that the film seemed to loose steam about halfway through. It was like the filmmakers played everything they had for the first half, and then spent the last half coasting, throwing in concepts that have been played out before. Like, for instance, the obvious People Holed Up In The Mall rip from Dawn Of The Dead. I also would have appreciated the script to go more for the jugular with the material. Other than that, though, Eight Legged Freaks is a great mindless slice of B-movie cheese that revels in its lactose. Go ahead and sample…

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