old metalhead…you ever wore multiple colored bandanas around your legs.

…you wished you could wear the sawblade cod piece that Blackie Lawless sported in the 80’s.

…you wear a denim vest covered in patches and buttons over your leather biker jacket.

…Saxon’s “Denim & Leather” is your call to arms.

…you know what an SMF is.

…your idea of having fun is headbanging at a concert.

…you ever owned any album on 8-track tape.

…you bought Kiss’ Alive as a new release.

…you remember learning about new bands from tape trading and from compilations.

…the hair growing out of your ears is as long as your hair use to be on your head.

…a black concert shirt without any holes in it is your idea of dressing up.

…you know what the initials for NWOBHM mean.

…you remember the death of Phil Lynott and Bon Scott.

…you remember when Metallica was a metal band.

…you actually get Spinal Tap and laugh every time you see it.

…you remember buying a baseball tee from a concert.

…Anthrax, Metallica, Megadeth and Slayer were all new bands you were into in high school.

…you ever pounded nails into a leather wristband so that you could look as cool as Kerry King.

…your collection of concert/tour books is beginning to turn a little yellow.

…you still have a small vinyl collection sitting next to your CD player.

…you ever owned a “Disco Sucks” t-shirt.

…you ever owned a pair of parachute pants.

…you ever intentionally ripped you blue jeans because it was cool.

…you make fun of all the kids with the baggy pants today because they look like they have a load in their pants.

…you have your Chiropractor on speed dial so that you can reach him quickly after a concert.

…you ever tried on spandex!

..you ever dressed up like Kiss and did a mock Kiss show in your back yard.

…your girlfriend ever wore a roach clip with a feather in her hair.

…you are familiar with the PMRC.

…you can finish this sentence, “What do you wanna do with your life? I _______ ______!”

…you remember when Slayer use to wear make-up.

…you can finish this phrase, “bang your head, metal health will ___ ____ _____.”

…if you know what S.O.D. stands for or if you know who S.O.D. is.

…if some of your favorite albums are almost 30 years old.

…if you ever were a member of the KISS Army.

…when you are playing a show with your band and the opening band tells you they were big fans of you when they were kids.
…when many of the albums you love never saw the light of being released on CD.

…when many of the albums you love WERE released on CD, but in the title of “Classics”, etc.

…when some of your favorite bands’ members have kids who are now in bands.

…when YOU have kids who are in bands.

…you have less hair growing out of your head and more growing out your nose, ears and other unmentionable places.